"It may be that the satisfaction I need depends on my going away, so that when I've gone and come back, I'll find it at home."

My God this is hard, so I'll start with Him. In the Name of God, most Gracious, most Merciful
Bless those who have been good to me, my parents, my brother and sister in law, my extended family, and my dearest friends
Everything is packed, contacts off, just me and the blurry screen


To say good bye to this household, as Rumi said: "It may be that the satisfaction I need depends on my going away, so that when I've gone and come back, I'll find it at home."

So here I go, tomorrow Philadelphia, the day after in the air to Switzerland and then Kenya.

My name is Tanim Awwal, and I have begun nothing, just continued this blessed existence. One that I have been blind to for much of my conscious life.

I don't think I was self aware until I was thirteen when, stumbling upon a book that talked about Musashi's principles, I made my own. Courage, leadership, integrity, grace and zen.

And now, that's my only constant besides God and compassion. 

The only thing I'll have when my saintly parents will eventually need my help in the future.

Heck of a near digression from leaving the country in two years right?

It's been a year since I graduated from American, and four since I finished Rutgers Prep, and now I continue what my 2007 letter to myself stated

"I want you to know that I take the value of being a genuinely kind person over gaining material ambition...I don't completely know what I want to do in life, so I don't expect you to be a lawyer or environmental advocate, but I expect you to help people"

Nothing is a beginning, everything is a continuation of the Divine Spark which my Lord has given me. So let's all shine right?

I packed one 57 lb suitcase, one guitar, one heavy dufflebag, and a heavy backpack. I don't know how much that will prepare me for Wednesday, but here I go.